"You're a really good breather."

I don't think I've mentioned it here at all, but we are attending hypnobirthing classes in preparation for the Big Day. Let me just backtrack and say that I never in a million years thought I would say that. Even as little as a year ago I was all 'stab me in the back, thank you very much.'

Then, like a crazy person, I became addicted to reading birth stories. Well the more I read, the more and more I found myself becoming wary of medicated births. I'm not going to get into specifics or start preaching, and I will say that I don't judge anyone for going that route. I may still end up down that path myself, for all I know. But what I do know is that I am going to try my best not to.

When I first expressed to my doctor that I would like to try to go natural, she immediately recommended the hypnobirthing class. I took her advice and signed up for it, without really looking into it at all. I had heard little bits about it in the past, but not much. So going into the class I wasn't really sure what it was going to be about. I just knew that my doctor warned me to stay away from the regular childbirth class offered by our hospital, as it is geared toward a medicated birth, and wouldn't help me attempt to go natural.

I left the first class feeling SO good about my choice. It's exactly what I was looking for, and I am now really looking forward to labor and delivery. Sure there are some parts of Marie Mongan's beliefs that are a bit over the top for me, but the important part is that the L&D nurse teaching the class is right in my comfort level. That gives me confidence that the nurses and I are going to be on the same page.

Of course even though all of what we have been learning has been wonderful and encouraging, I still had a little voice in the back of my mind whispering, 'what if...?' What if I can't hack it when the time comes? Well last week in class we were practicing our relaxation and breathing. We had done this before, but this time we were practice the contraction breathing, which is deeper than the regular relaxation breathing.

After we were done the nurse said '[jCam], you're a really good breather.' J and I kind of joked and said, 'well I've got a few years of experience, har har.' She said 'no really, do you do yoga? You are doing a great job. Everyone else watch her, she is really good.' It made me feel so good to hear her say that! When I told her I don't (and never have) done yoga, she said 'you're just a natural then. You are going to do great.'

I'll tell you, it was just a small compliment, but it made all the difference in the world to me. For her to single me out and tell me how awesome I am going to do, when I was just doing what felt right, was exactly what I needed to hear to make that little voice shut up. I don't have to worry about not knowing what to do, I'm already doing it right, by instinct.

I can do this.


Disclaimer - I am well aware that the best laid plans come undone, so I don't want to be called a hypocrite if for one reason or another I don't get my natural birth. I don't know what will happen when the Big Day comes, all I can do is prepare for it the way I see best :-)